A trigger can set emotion and behaviour in motion before you have consciously chosen anything, and by the time you notice, the reaction is already underway. The STOP technique opens a gap between the trigger and the reaction, and in that gap your options become visible. STOP means this. Stop. Take a breath. Observe what is happening and identify your options. Then proceed with the response you choose. Rehearsing it while things are calm is what makes it reachable when they are not.

In this exercise you will bring a situation to mind and picture the moment just before the usual reaction. You will stop there, imagining the pause at that exact point without letting the familiar reaction continue. You will take one slow breath and feel it enter and leave, letting it buy you time. Then you will observe, the emotion, the sensations in your body, the thoughts, and the urge to act, staying with the whole reaction long enough to recognize the pattern without acting it out. You will ask whether the reaction is connected with trust, value, or acceptance, and notice the story your mind is telling about what the trigger means. Then you will identify your options, considering what you could say, do, postpone, clarify or decline, and weighing them against your values, your goals, your safety and the likely impact, including how the automatic reaction would be likely to land by comparison. Finally you will proceed, picturing yourself giving the response you have chosen and rehearsing the words or the action clearly, then replaying the whole sequence from trigger to response.